Sorry, Your Feet are Too Big!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Looks like I'm in a moaning mood this Friday morning!!! So, the other day I was shopping which is almost everday...hahaha....anyways, I go to the store. I look around at the lovely shoes and just admire them, as you do!!!! At this time, I had recently just came back from England....so, I wanted to see if the Korean style were similar to the ones back home. When all of a sudden my peace was disturbed by the supposed shoe assistant.




He must have thought he was helping me out, NO END. When he opened his offensive GOB and said "BIG SIZE is over here" and at this point, I wanted to yell some CHOICE WORDS but the problem being the limits of my Korean prevents me from expressing myself in the manner to which I am accustomed at home. So, I walked away with steam coming from my HEAD.




Like seriously, I know which area is selling the 250mm shoes (uk 6) because it has the smallest selection and the plainest styles in comparison to the others!@!! I dude...could you just FUCK RIGHT OFF!!! I don't even have BIG FEET just Korean women have insanely small feet which makes all foreigners appear to have big feet. The funny thing is many Korean women are taller than me but they still have smaller feet. Which is bizarre because at home taller women have bigger feet than shorter people...so, life is a bit topsy turvy!!!!!

What is the Obsession with Double Eyelids?

I think before I came to Korea I had never heard of double eyelids! I must admit when I first heard the term I was a little lost. Well, if you have never heard the term....I my reader.....am going to enlighten you. This beautiful little angel has got double eyelids and so do many other people but most asians from Korea, China and Japan do not. So, double eyelids is the term which explains the extra fold of skin on your eyelids which I explained is absent in many asians. Big DEAL, right!!!!


I had never given eyelids a second thought until I came here. I honestly feel that asian eyes are very exotic and quite attractive without the @double eyelid@ but you know how it is.....everyone wants what they can't have....or can they have it!!! Well, again....reader I am going to enlighten you on how many asian obtain "double eyelids." The cheap and non permenant option is just to buy a pack from the shop.....that will have some tape or something in it to create the illusion of a double eyelid. Well, that's not too bad....you fancy a little change....you wonder what it'll look like if you had that extra flap of skin.



But, unfortunately it doesn't end there!!! Many students from around age sixteen years old get cosmetic plastic surgery to obtain these eyelids. They do it at this age because it is before their graduation picture is taken....so, supposedly it makes it look more natural??????? Not to sound RACIST but how the FUCK can it look natural when 99.9% of the time most Koreans don't have double eyelids and maybe if they do it's because they are mixed or they have the smallest flap of skin already. But it doesn't just stop at creating the double eyelids some kids even have surgery to make the eyes look bigger. It really makes me feel sad when someone changes something that is already beautiful..... The other day a Korean actually said they hate another singer because "his eyes are too Asian"...absolutely mental!!!

Why, Don't You Mean What You Say!!

I really get annoyed when you make plans with someone and you specificially make your feelings known to that person to avoid future misunderstandings and then what do they do.... they S.H.I.T on you (just like the slim shady song)!!!! I'm talking at least a thirty minute conversation where you say......I DON'T LIKE THAT BAR but I know you want to go (UNSELFISH) so let's go for a while and watch your friend's set (COMPROMISING) and then we'll leave. I don't want to get stuck there all night. Sorry, to go on but I just want to you to understand, what I'm saying. I think any intectually challenged person could understand those plans, RIGHT?? NO, WRONG!!!




I think I have stumbled across the most selfish girl in the world. Rihanna feels like the only girl in the world BUT this girl is the MOST SELFISH GIRL in the world. Almost three hours later, I am stuck in this bar listening to the repetitve songs and this girl won't stop knocking back the Gin & Tonics. That, is another thing. I think she is on a mission to get completely WASTED and not in a good way. You know when you're drinking to have a GOOD NIGHT and you know when someone's DRINKING just to BLOCK SHIT OUT.




Three and a half hours later (or what felt like it) I said I'm out of here. I've reached my LIMIT ....I told you earlier, RIGHT. What does SHE do next....she orders another G&T (like oh my fucking god, no you didn't) and I say, right. I'm NEVER going out with you AGAIN!!!! I think I will stand by my last words because I thought friendships and nights out were based on mutual agreement and compromise. Hello, you are a completely SELFISH LIAR!!!

K.i.d.s. Say The Funniest Things

Teaching English as a foreign language can be hilarious. I mean the things that students say can make or break your day.

Teacher: Nathan isn't coming anymore.

Student: What teacher. Nathan is an animal.

Teacher: Not animal. Anymore.

Student: Teacher what animal is he?




Other days they are offensive little bastards.

Student: Oh, teacher that is scary.

Teacher: What.

Student: Teacher you shouldn't wear eyeline.

Teacher: Well, you little bitch there are somethings you shouldn't say to someone three times your age. Shut the fuck up and practice your god dam phonics. By the way you dumb fuck it's EYELINER. (p.s. this is the private dialogue that I had with myself).






This is what I wanted too do.

Student: Teacher, that is scary!

Teacher: No BITCH this is scary.

Student: Ouch!

Teacher: That's right BITCH you got knocked the fuck out. Now keep your remarks to your god dam self.

Thank You For Not Smoking

Before I came to Korea, I didn't smoke. But now all I seem to do is put cigarettes in my mouth. I must admit things are different here...I mean at home in Birmingham, England. You can't smoke in public places but in Korea you can smoke almost anywhere and everywhere. Plus they are so freaking cheap. I mean fags are only sold in packs of 20 and they cost about £1.25. How wonderful for me...who smokes like a pissing chimney now.



Another thing I only started doing more here is drinking copious amounts of coffee. I mean I drank coffee before but I was always more of a tea person. But to get the tea I want I have too travel so far to the store and needless to say I am one of the laziest people on the planet. So, I drink coffee....cups and cups of the stuff.

This new diet of mine is not good for my health. But on the plus side am getting skinnier and needless to say I'm so fed up of walking into shops in Korea and being unable to find my size or worst still being told they don't have large size.

Like bitch....don't get me started on the whole LARGE size thing. That is another post entirely!!!!!!!!!!!

Uncertainty

I wonder if I've made the right decision???? I decided to stay in Korea for another year but after completing the application. I have so many feelings of uncertainty. My heart feels like it's being torn apart. I'm worried that my relationship won't last! It's quite new about five months and I fear that I won't be able to stay here if it should end. I miss my family so much these days and even though I'm having fun here......will I still be having fun in eight months time. Will my relationship withstand the hands of time. I fear my thoughts of negativity are going to lead it too finish prematurely.

Lack of physicality is becoming troublesome. But then I wonder is intimacy more important than sex. The lack of the latter is causing me so much frustration and irritability. So, clearly I am in need of the sex but my pride is causing obstruction. Communication. I know......I mentioned it once before but stumbled and hit my head against a closed door. The response was I'm tired and as the weeks pass by I wonder if he is sleeping with someone else......Have I made the right decision to stay????

Language Paranoia

I've never felt so insecure in a relationship before!!!! What is the cause of this new found paranoia. My first language is English and my boyfriend's is Korean. Whenever his phone rings or he gets a message or he chats online......I feel a twinge of paranoia.

I can't understand what his saying to who ever his talking too. I guess I have trust issues....well usually my previous boyfriend's first language was English. So, naturally I can catch the gist of what they're saying or if they're talking to a boy or girl. But now I don't have this luxury and it's driving me a little INSANE.

I wanna know what his saying and whose he saying it too. Is that so bad??? I don't know but I hate feeling paranoid. Now, TRUST has never been such a burden. I mean you always have to trust your boyfriend to some extent but you know....when they're talking to too many females or saying sweet nothings to other women....at least you could understand if it was in ENGLISH. Wowwwwwww, I have a serious case of paranoia. HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!